00:00.00 kinkella Hello and welcome back to the pseudo archeology podcast episode 121 I'm your host Andrew King Kella and we have been discussing indiana jones 5 otherwise known as Indiana Jones and the dial of Destiny. So we've gone through the 3 acts right? from beginning to end and I told you at the very top that I'm torn about this movie. There's parts I really like and parts that I think are quite weak and. Where does that leave us I man I don't know I I have to say you know what? let's start with what I liked what I liked about this movie. Okay as I talked about in the previous segment. Serious scenes I thought the serious scenes of the death of mut um of ah Indiana Jones not wanting to go home and marion coming back were all excellent and. It just shows you what we want as human beings we don't need all the explosions and shit we just need a simple scene between 2 characters with close ups on their face and we see how they feel and um I know that. 01:35.84 kinkella Phoebe Wall a bridge has gotten a lot of negative publicity from this but I thought as an actress she did great in those and that's what really matters so serious scenes a big thumbs up the use of the antikythera device. As this time travel thing and of course as kind of the mcguffin the thing that they are trying to get and what's driving the story along I thought was great and you're like wait a second Andrew can kea host of the pseudo archeology podcast thought the use of the antikyther device was great in this sure. Because again this isn't on the history channel this is Indiana Jones is fine you know of course in reality the antikyther device is much more something that was used just to kind of trace the planets and trace days of the week and this kind of thing. Ah, but that usage as a plot device I got no problems with it I thought it was fun. Um I really liked the villain. Thought that was great again. We want we want someone who's deep. We want someone who we like to hate right? We want to think of like hannibal lecter is the best film of all time right? We love Hannibal lecter in silence of the lambs. 03:02.60 kinkella Right? Remember he eats people remember that but you still like him right? This guy is like a nazi but you still like him you know you still kind of feel for him and that's that's the sign of a good villain. You know they can they're they're terrible. But you're still like into it. Ah, um, so you're all just you all bad people you like you like nazis and people who eat people. What's wrong with you so those are good right. The whole tomb of archimedes scene. The idea of going to the tomb I thought the tomb was really cool. It's like interesting the time travel thing I can't believe it I got to give a my massive props for that working right? time travel stuff I always think sucks. But I don't think it did this time. The dive with the eels and stuff I thought the overall dive scene was well done very in the mode of Indiana Jones um the the horse chase was great and the badass indie beaten people up right before the horse chase right on. That's what I want indiano if I don't care if he's eighty years old he's beatating people up and it seems realistic. So there's some stuff that I thought this movie really did well and when I watched those scenes I was like yeah now on the flip side. 04:36.62 kinkella Okay, there's parts that I didn't like so much. but but I'm not here to just like bitch and moan about the parts I didn't like how do we fix this? How do we here's a couple easyzy things I think that could be done to make this movie better like you could make this director's cut. In like a weekend and I think it would just be so much better here's here's what you do go with me on this first I'll try and go through from beginning to end first cut the first 20 minutes this movie is two and a half hours long you don't need the cartoony. Indiana Jones as young look how much cgi we can do I don't care it plays fake it plays weird and I know it's not really Harrison Ford because it's like not him. He's like his not improvis, fun self cut it. Cut the part cut the part of Indiana Jones waking up in his underwear I don't want to see that I almost had to turn away. You can even cut the part where he gets dressed in the morning here's what you do instead you start which is the montage of images we hear some kind of the maudlin indiana jones music. You know that the. Sort of slower Indiana Jones looking at Indiana Jones images of his past. Um adventures just give me a montage of photos could do that in an afternoon and then start with him in the classroom. 06:12.97 kinkella And then just the fact that the students are asleep and stuff and nut into it that already tells us something's a little wrong, right? We don't need to be beaten over the head. We don't need to see a half naked half drunk Indiana Jones that's just a bummer. We can be. Bummed out enough knowing that he's not a great college professor anymore. So cut all that stuff out you start right? there 1 of the big problems with this movie is act 1 is way too fricking long so that'll shorten it up. Um. 06:46.57 kinkella And then we just kind of lean into this story. That's a bit different than the other four Indiana Jones movies and it's okay, after this let's start cutting all the hey you're so old jokes and that would be easy. Half of them Phoebe Wallabridge says like as an aside or almost winner backs to the camera. You can just literally cut the sound and keep going. It would be so easy. We. We don't want to make her seem so negative. So we cut those There's a bunch of them. There's a time when she says oh that your hat makes you you look two years younger just jerky and lame cut it. Um there's the part where she traps in the in his own office for the ca agents to get him I don't think that's necessary. Cut the scene where she actually traps him she can still just be seen to get out of the office without him and then he can still be shouting after her and she's just gone. That's okay, you don't have to show her being an overt asshole right? Like oh I'm trapping you in here. There's no reason for that. No reason for her to be so harsh and. Cruel to him. Um, there's a there's a quote when they're having the tuck Tuck Chase that where she is just bragging about herself I'm smart I'm beautiful cut it right? It's understood. We see her be too great already where she's just good at everything. 08:21.48 kinkella You know when she also talks about how good she is. It's like we're straining credibility. Um, we already see are almost too good. Let's cut that bragging is not attractive so easy scene. Tuck Tuxine chases too long anyway, cut it easy peasy i'm. 08:41.40 kinkella I feel weird because I'm like dude I'm not making this movie but I'm also like this is a easy edit man um cut the scene of teddy learning to fly. It's idiotic and and cut the scene where. Phoebe Wall the bridge says like you've never flown a plane at all just cut it. You can even add in his voice going like my dad taught me and you wouldn't even notice you cut it in when his backs to the camera this happens way more often than you think in movies you know just to fill in little plot holes and stuff. There's little stuff. There's a so car screech at the airport when sala saying goodbye to indie and the idea is indie so doddering that he walked out into traffic just cut that there's no reason why do we have to keep trying to show India as a doddering old guy. We want to show him as conflicted. But still cool. Um, oh and then of course when sala gives him his bag with his whip and hat since we've cut the beginning we haven't really seen the whip and hat much if at all give that sucker a huge musical sting. Um, bu boom but um, right on his stuff. You know that would be so cool. Oh they missed that trick and it's so iconic right? So if you do that and see I think. 10:13.86 kinkella I think their act 3 is pretty good. So if you cut the first part of act one tighten it back 2 and then Phoebe Waller Bridge is actually nicer to indie as we go we cut out a bunch of those jerky one liners. She seems like a more. Compassionate character everything cool I'm telling you guys I'm telling you ah and a weekend director's cut did it's going it'll it'll time out at like 2 hours and 5 minutes or something like that so much. But you're welcome world. You're welcome. Um, couple more things people ask for rankings on these you know how would you rank the 5 indiana jones movies here's what I would say um, 1 and 3 are obviously the best ones. And people will argue. What's better 1 or 3 I'm always a huge fan of the original so I will put one first and 3 as a very close second they're basically you know trading places for number 1 I would say the same thing with star wars actually I prefer the original star wars movie to empire strikes back? Yeah, oh yeah oh I said it and I'm telling you really go watch star wars you guys watch the original watch it again. Watch it in seriousness. Nobody home. 11:44.42 kinkella Sit down watch that sucker and you're like good christ is this a good movie. It is and I'm telling you empire strikes back cloud city drags a little. Let's be honest, they're there a long time little slow anyway. I'm always going to give so indiano jones I rank 1 is number 1 and that also has marry you have Marion Ravenwood she's such a great character and such a great actress right? So good iconic. So one 3 is close 3 is close close close Second you know Sean Connery it's great and then of course 4 is the worst one and I still do think that so one in 3 great for pretty terrible. Now you have this weird doldrums middle does it go 1 3 5 2 4 or 1 3 2 5 four I don't know and who cares but I would say 5 and 2 are somewhere in that middle ground. Um, ah I if I had to vote right now. 13:01.97 kinkella I think I might even like 5 a little better than 2 this one but it just depends on what we're talking about each one of them 5 and 2 are similar because so this is temple of doom right. Because they both have really good scenes really cool scenes and scenes that really need some help. Um, and so you know again ultimately, who cares, but that's what I would say obviously 1 in 3 are way up. There. 4 is down and 2 and 5 or you know, ah exchanging blos. And the middle ground finally the second time I watched this I watched it with my daughter and she's fifteen and I really was interested in what she thought and there were a couple things first. Right? At the end of the movie right? It goes to black and they start to play the raiders march and I'm like I'm like hey hey, Grace's time to go and she's like just a second I'm vibing he did the youth she was vibe into raiders March like good for her. The other thing she said she liked the villain I'm like yes she also said something I thought was really really interesting I'm like hey Grace what'd you think of the movie. She's like you know as a standalone movie I thought it was really good. But. 14:34.15 kinkella As an Indiana Jones movie I didn't think it really fit and I'm like that's interesting. You know because I think I think for those who've watched the movie you can kind of see what she means and. It can be from a lot of reasons I think part of it is because they pushed the um Phoebe Waller Bridge character too much. They kind of you know Indiana Jones took a bit of a backseed at certain times I can see that. So. 15:10.81 kinkella Good for her man. Um, there's there's hope for ah, there's hope for the youth that tomorrow. Um with that. You know it's just there are so many critics and so many things online. Yeah, the the talk about this including myself I I hope those of you who are fans of Indiana Jones go watch it. Go watch it in the theater. It still has love it or hate it. It still has the music it still has Harrison Ford it still has adventure. Um, it still even has the font It's so funny at the beginning I'm like oh my god the font. Um, you'll it's an enjoyable movie to watch in a theater even with whatever faults it may have so. Hey man go remember the good old days. Let the movie wash over you and with that I'll see you guys next time take her easy.